


Royal Comfort

by blackbirdandcat



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Angst, Blood, Comfort, Depression, F/M, Fluffy, Self Harm, Self Loathing, Support
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-26
Updated: 2017-07-26
Packaged: 2018-12-07 02:49:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11614335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackbirdandcat/pseuds/blackbirdandcat





	Royal Comfort

“She’s done it again.” Noctis said softly, padding out of the bathroom of the hotel in Lestallum. 

“What?” Gladiolus’ voice was first to rise from the quietness of the calm night, it had been a long day of them traveling around they needed a break from this havoc. 

“Her legs.  . .it’s bad.” The young prince said softly, wiping some blood off of his hands. 

“Is that blood?” Prompto asked, putting his phone down, blue eyes wide with shock. 

The King’s Shield was up to his feet in moments once he saw the blood on Noctis, it wasn’t his but his girlfriend’s blood. His heart beating madly in his chest as he made it past Noctis moving to the bathroom looking in the small room. Noctis had her wrapped up in one of the softest towels her pale legs, covered in blood as she was shaking terribly. 

“I thought she was doing better?” Gladiolus whispered as his heart was pounding in his chest, not knowing what to do, it broke his heart to see her like this. 

“I thought so. . .she’s been smiling a lot so I thought things were better.” Prompto replied softly, not wanting her to hear, to feel guilty about it he understood what was bothering her. 

“This is ridiculous. . .” Gladiolus muttered darkly under his breath as he pushed into the bathroom as Ignis came back into the room. 

* * *

 

Hearing the tromp of boots, I took in a shaky breath it was Gladiolus. . .I could recognize that strong scent of leather and cedar. I curled inward to myself, leaning forward my long black hair curtaining around my face covering my startled expression. 

Of course he would be first to come in - to confront me for what I did, _again_. To yell at me. To chastise me. To tell me he doesn’t want to be with me any longer that next time I would end up killing myself. That I need to leave the group that my skills are not needed. 

_That I was useless.  
_

_That I was not his girl, that I couldn’t be his girl ever if I fell from grace and harmed myself like this._

I started to cry at the thoughts that rushed through my head at a fast pace that made me start to hiccup through the tears. I dug my short nails into my knees tearing at the scratches that were already there, surprising that short nails could do such damage but they could. Panting heavily, shaking, rocking my body back and forth the tears just flowing down my face so easily, skin ripping open as more blood flood down my legs. Crimson rivers matching the salty tears flowing down my face like streams. I couldn’t look over to him, he was so perfect and I was so flawed I couldn’t be one for him. My anxiety was so high at the moment that I couldn’t handle being near him, I loved him so much that I handle it. But I wasn’t worthy of it. 

**I am not worthy of any of their love or their kindness.**

Not the way that Noctis knows when I’m feeling depressed even though I lie through my pearly whites. Not the way that Prompto knows the right angle to take a picture so I don’t feel uncomfortable about my weight in photos. Not the way Gladiolus holds me at night, whispering in my ear how much he needs me and how much he loves me. Not the way that Ignis sees that my mania is appearing and finds things for me to do that keeps it from going out of hand. 

_I’m just a waste of space.  
_

_I’m not a human._

_I am filth._

The sound I heard, made it worse the guilt worse. 

**I heard a sob.**

Freezing in spot, white knuckled as my fingers dug deep into my flesh, as I heard the door slam against the wall as Gladiolus knelt before me grabbing my wrists in one hand pulling them away. With his free hand Gladiolus pulled on the wash cloth off the basin, a few tear drops falling from the giant of a man in front of me, hitting the washcloth. His large hands shaking, the one that cleaned up my fingers getting the blood off it, getting the small scraps of skin out from under the nails. 

“Iggy -- com--e he--re.” Gladiolus choked out a order, his voice sounding broken. “Get som-e p---otions.” 

“No, -- don’t wa--ste thin--gs like th-at on me, it’s poi--ntless I’m not w-orth the Gil.” I sobbed brokenly as I stared up at the shocked expression on Ignis’ face, those emerald green eyes wide with fear. _Distaste_. 

Ignis turned around leaving the room heading to the pack that carried the potions and restoratives. Noctis coming into the room and Prompto leaning over his shoulder, there was tears running down the blonds face. 

“Let’s get the towel damp that will help clean things up some.” 

“Use your magic on her Noct.” Gladiolus barked at Noctis who reached down to grab at the washcloth.

“She won’t let me.” He responds, ignoring the rough tone his Shield took with him, his emotions were getting the better of him, he would address it later. 

“I don’t care if she doesn’t want you to or not this is more than what a potion can handle.” 

“Please Gladiolus please stop. . .just that is too much for Noctis it takes a lot out of him to do so. I’m not worth it.”

“GOD DAMNIT JIN YOU ARE WORTH _IT ALL_.” Gladiolus turned back to me shouting at me the tears that fell from his eyes, made those passionate amber more intense as he stared up at me. 

My heart cracked further, the sob that escaped my mouth as I slid off the closed lid of the toilet wrapping my arms around his neck scraping my torn legs more as I slid them against the dirtied floor burying my face in his neck as I cried. I know I shouldn’t be this close, I know I don’t deserve the skin to skin contact it’s not right to feel this way. To feel the love emanating from Gladiolus as he wrapped his arms around my back holding me close. 

Situating me on his lap Gladiolus got comfortable and lifted my legs up placing my feet on the lid of the toilet. Prompto came in behind Gladiolus along with Ignis who handed off some potions to Gladiolus. 

“Here have something to drink, okay - it’s Choco-cola I know you like it.” Prompto said handing me a can of soda, a straw sticking out of it. 

“Thanks Prompto. . .” I said wearily, taking the bright yellow can from him, hands shaking. 

“Use both hands, don’t want you spilling it, last can I have you know? Was saving it but you are more important than my sugar craving.” Prompto said leaning forward cupping my other hand against the can. 

“I don’t want to take your last one though. . .share?” I said, staring at the can then over to his bright blue eyes. 

Prompto knew I would feel guilty if I did drink his last one all knowing all to well about my lack of self-worth. 

“Of course, we can share.” He said sweetly taking the can from my hands taking a sip himself. 

Squishing himself in the small bathroom Ignis moved in between Prompto and myself, looking up at me trying to read my expression. Gladiolus finished cleaning up my legs, gentle brushing of the wet cloth soft humming in my ear. It was a soft little song he heard from long ago something about wind beneath his his wings. Ignis uncapped the potion, the light green liquid bringing a slight bitter smell to nose. My nose was stuffy from crying but the smell was strong enough that even my dulled senses could make grasp of it. Taking the towel that had fallen from my shoulders Ignis got it damp from the potion and rubbed my leg as Gladiolus buried his face in the crook of my neck again. Noctis handed another potion to Ignis from the door way as there wasn’t much room for him to be there now, Prompto handed the soda back to me. 

“I thought you were feeling better, Jin.” Gladiolus finally spoke up his voice rough from his own crying, his own personal turmoil.

“I was. . .I just woke up feeling like everything just felt wrong everything out of place. I feel so useless. . .my skills aren’t that good my White Mage skills aren’t quite up to par. I feel like I weigh you guys down with my slowness. I just feel horrid. The only thing that feels right is ripping open the scratches, it feels good once the skin breaks open the pain that rushes through me feels good.” I answered Gladiolus. 

“You know that is far from the truth?” Ignis spoke up drying my legs off as the healing properties of the potions took affect a light green haze surrounding them as the cuts started to heal. 

“I don’t feel like it is. . .” I comment as Gladiolus placed a few soft kisses to my neck moving my hair out of the way. 

“You are one of the promising mages I’ve seen specially starting at such a late time in life you are fantastic.” Noctis supplied a soft concerned smile on his face, brushing some long strands of black hair out of his eyes. 

“You are quite funny too, always cracking me up with your sarcasm. Plus you are the quickest to heal anyone in battle.” Prompto piped up cheerfully giving me a winning smile. 

“I have to support you guys no matter what.  . .” 

“Jin it’s been a immense help that you have joined in our group, your talents in cooking has helped me greatly. I feel comfortable of having you on the field knowing you can handle yourself when anything comes at us. Plus you are the only one that can truly put up with Gladio.” Ignis commented soft, a  hand resting on my calf thumb rubbing so patterns on my pale, scarred skin. 

“I love you so much, you realize this? You are worth more than all the riches in the vault, I look forward to spending each day with you. The way you smile at me each morning, despite my groggy sleepy face is staring at you, hair all messed up and morning breath, you kiss me all over wrapping your arms around me holding me tight. Wishing me a good morning, your beautiful body a place for me to worship nightly.” Gladiolus said hugging me tightly peppering me with kisses on my neck and shoulder. 

“I would be so lost without you I wouldn’t know what to do. You complete me in ways I didn’t know was incomplete.” Gladiolus added, slowly getting to his feet with me in his arms still.

Prompto helped support me as Gladiolus set me to my feet, I wobbled a little as they were sore from all the intense abuse they just went through. Ignis got to his feet, a hand on my shoulder as he massaged his fingers around the tense muscles. With his chest pressed against my back Gladiolus slowly brought me to the living room in moments I was surrounded by all of them pulling me into a full body hug. 

“What would you like to do for the rest of the day? It’s too rainy outside to do much so we should just relax.” Noctis offered, as he pulled away giving me a reassuring smile. 

“Can we have a movie night then? Push the beds together and make snacks and watch some good flicks?” 

“Sounds like a plan baby-girl. What movie?” Gladiolus asked leading me to the bed. “You sit here and direct okay?” 

“Okay,” I say as I get onto one of the bed as Noctis and Gladiolus pushed the beds all together so we all could curl up and watch a movie together. “How about Jurassic Park? I have it on my phone we can hook it up to the t.v.” 

“Oh I’m on that!” Prompto said reaching for the phone pulling up the device smirking at the goofy photo of Gladiolus and I as the backdrop. 

“Snacks?” Ignis asked. 

“Popcorn, hot chocolate, coffee, nachos and those peanut butter cups from the shop we got earlier.” I suggested a smile coming to my face at the thought of it all. 

Within a half hour all of us were curled up on the beds, I was nestled in between Gladiolus’ legs resting my back against his broad chest as his arms wrapped around my waist, chin resting on the top of my head. I held the massive bowl of popcorn and a cup of coffee. All the food was passed around and enjoyed as the movie started to play. 

Everything was starting to feel right again, everything was going to be okay as long as I had them with me. As long as they supported me when I was at my worse just like I did when they were at their worse. I loved them all so much.


End file.
